PFLAG Canada

The following books are among the most read, re-read, bought and borrowed by PFLAG Canada members. We hope you will find these selections insightful, engaging and worthy of your recommendation.

Beyond Coming Out: Experiences of Positive Gay Identity

By Kevin Alderson, Ph.D.
Insomniac Press, 2000. ISBN 189583757X

Dr. Alderson reveals common patterns in the development of a positive gay identity through the life stories of sixteen gay men. His subjects include a teenager with cerebral palsy, a high-ranking politician, a drag queen, a leatherman, a schoolteacher and an accountant, each who have achieved a positive self-image in society. These in-depth case studies pave the way for Dr. Alderson's incisive analysis of the major themes emerging at each stage of development.

Coming Out of Shame: Transforming Gay and Lesbian Lives

By Gershen Kaufman & Lev Raphael
Main Street Books, 1996. ISBN 0385477961

This book exposes the role shame has come to play in the lives of gay men and lesbians. Written about gay and lesbian people but for a straight reader, it is an important and valuable insight into gay and lesbian people's feelings and the emotional difficulties of coming-out.

Coming Out to Parents: A Two-Way Survival Guide for Lesbians and Gay Men and Their Parents

By Mary V. Borhek
Pilgrim Press, 1993. ISBN 0829809570

This book explores the fears and misgivings associated with coming-out as experienced by GLBT people and their parents. It relates the difficult and often very painful experience of growing up in a Christian home and recognizing one's innate homosexuality, which seems to be at odds with that faith. Helpful and down-to-earth.

Coming Out: An Act of Love

By Rob Eichberg, Ph.D.
Plume, 1991. ISBN 0452266858

Written for both men and women, it is a step-by-step guide to understanding and accepting your homosexuality and coping with how others may react to it. Eichberg provides a positive yet realistic look at the coming-out process using examples from his own practice, including letters from gay people to their parents, siblings and friends. There are also chapters on how AIDS can affect the coming-out process and ways to deal with AIDS-phobia on a personal and political level.

Now That I'm Out, What Do I Do?

By Brian McNaught
Stonewall Inn Editions, 1998. ISBN 0312195184

For many gay men and lesbian women, the first step in a long journey is acknowledging and accepting their sexuality. But what happens to those men and women after they have come to terms with this aspect of their lives? For many it may mean a complete reevaluation of very basic issues: family, relationships, community, and love.

In this series of essays, McNaught explores these various aspects of life that may now be called into question for these men and women, and he sets out to educate and help guide them through the challenges they may encounter.

Now That I'm Out, What Do I Do? solidifies McNaught's place as one of the best-known speakers on the issues that face gays and lesbians.

By Carolyn W. Griffin & Marian J. Wirth
St. Martin's Griffin, 1997. ISBN 0312167814

'Rarely is there a book published that can be called a true 'must.' But if you or especially your parents are not feeling good about their knowledge of your homosexuality, this is one.' - Jeff Kirsch, Out!

Free Your Mind: The Book For Gay, Lesbian, and Bisexual Youth and Their Allies

By E. Bass
HarperCollins, 1996. ISBN 0060951044

Gay and lesbian teenagers relate their experiences regarding the discovery and acceptance of their sexual orientation. Includes suggestions for coping with prejudice, political and religious issues. Families, counselors and friends should read this book, too. A guide for LGBT youth and their families. It covers issues of family, friends, love, spirituality, health, and school. Rich in accurate information and practical advice.

Homosexuality and Family Relations

By Frederick W. Bozett & Marvin B. Sussman
Haworth Press, 1990. ISBN 0866569472

Edited by two experts on family relations, this book covers a wide range of issues from a GLBT perspective: religion, adoption and parenting, married gays and lesbians, and aging.

Homosexuality: The Secret a Child Dare Not Tell

By Mary Ann Cantwell
Rafael Press, 1998. ISBN 0964982994

Homosexuality: The Secret a Child Dare Not Tell was written and published to educate the public about the obvious, yet irrationally-resisted, fact that homosexuals do not spring up at university enclaves and on city streets as fully-grown, mature sexual beings. First they were children, and as children, subjected to a great deal of hatred and other negativity. The book gathers surveys from many gay and lesbian adults and parents of gay and lesbian adults, and shows that all gays and lesbians shared the experience of having to hide something essential about themselves from their families and friends. - Amazon.com

Joining The Tribe: Growing Up Gay And Lesbian in the 90's

By Linnea A. Due
Anchor Books, 1995. ISBN 0385475004

In Joining The Tribe, journalist Linnea Due travels America to create a portrait of gay and lesbian teenagers as an endangered and vulnerable community whose diversity, courage, and resiliency will inspire gay and straight readers alike. - Anchor Books

Lesbian and Gay Youth: Care and Counseling

By Caitlin Ryan & Donna Futterman
Columbia University Press, 1998. ISBN 0231111916

'Ryan and Futterman provide us with a vision and the information we need to support the organizations that are desperately trying to respond to these needs and to mobilize forces to change the health care and research agendas that are killing our people through their silence and neglect.' - Tony Silvestre, Lambda Book Report

Lesbian Couples: A Guide to Creating Healthy Relationships

By Marilee Clunis, Ph.D. & G. Dorsey Green, Ph.D.
Seal Press, 2000. ISBN 1580050417

Two experienced lesbian therapists give lesbian couples the tools they need to handle issues such as living arrangements, work, money, coming out, and conflict resolution. Included is new material that addresses personal and community issues such as monogamy and open relationships, transgender identity, bisexuality, butch-femme roles, and s/m.

By Don Clark, Ph.D.
Celestial Arts, 4th Rev, 2005. ISBN 1587612364

Thoroughly revised for the fourth time, Loving Someone Gay remains the most comprehensive profile of positive gay identity in print, offering courageous support and compassionate guidance for gay men and lesbians and the friends and families who love them. - Ten Speed Press, Celestial Arts

The Family Heart: A Memoir of When Our Son Came Out

By Robb Forman Dew
HarperCollins Canada / Perseus Books, 1998. ISBN 0201624508

Most books about parents dealing with their child's announcement of his or her homosexuality are cast as "self-help" or educational. In the absence of informed, non-judgemental material, these books are important, but more personal stories are also important. In The Family Heart: A Memoir of When Our Son Came Out, novelist Robb Forman Dew tells the story of what happen to her and her family after her son Stephen came out.

There are no melodramatic scenes, but Dew's story is breathtaking in its emotional detail and its explication of everyday life. What is daring, and surprising, about Dew's story is that the moral weight is not upon Stephen to deal with the confused reactions of his parents, but upon the parents to deal with their own mixed emotions and the negative reactions of their friends. Homophobia, not homosexuality, is the problem here. Dew's prose, like her award-winning fiction, sparkles, and the insights she offers are not simply about sexuality but about the myths and secrets we all create to "protect," "defend," and ultimately distort what a family should and can be. - Michael Bronski, Amazon.com

The Journey Out: A Guide for and About Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Teens

By Rachel Pollack & Cheryl Schwartz
Puffin, 1995. ISBN 0140372547

"You are not alone" is the intrinsic message of this frank, reassuring book aimed at teenagers who either are questioning their sexual orientations or have acknowledged that they are gay. The authors repeatedly emphasize the importance of self-acceptance as they offer advice on such topics as coming out to family and friends, coping with prejudice and rejection, reconciling one's sexuality with the sometimes conflicting tenets of organized religion and combating myths and stereotypes. In addition to their own authoritative counsel, they include copious quotes from gay or bisexual teens and supply an extensive list of sources of additional information and help, including community centers, crisis hotlines and supportive religious organizations. An explicit discussion of sexually transmitted diseases concludes with basic facts about AIDS and a characteristically sound admonition: "Become a responsible adult - not a statistic." A candid, accessible resource. Ages 12-up. - Publishers Weekly. Copyright 1995, Reed Business Information, Inc.

The Shared Heart: Portraits And Stories Celebrating Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual Young People

By Adam Mastoon
William Morrow & Company, 1997. ISBN 0688149316

Adam Mastoon's beautifully reproduced photographs of gay, lesbian, and bisexual young people are a revelation: each subject, posed yet casual, looks directly into the camera and invites us into his or her life. But the book is more than a photo gallery, and the personal statements written by each young person brings a sense of what it means to be a gay youth today. In a world in which gay teens are told that they either don't exist or should change their sexual orientation, The Shared Heart is a beacon of hope, clarity, and joy. - Amazon.ca

Together Forever: Lesbian and Gay Couples Share Their Secrets For Lasting Happiness

By Eric Marcus
Anchor Publishing, 1999. ISBN 0385488769

Traveling across the United States, Eric Marcus met and interviewed forty gay and lesbian couples who have achieved the dream of a happy, lasting relationship. In Together Forever, Marcus writes about their lives and the secrets to long-term happiness these couples have learned over the nine to fifty years they've been together.

Biological Exuberance: Animal Homosexuality and Natural Diversity

By Bruce Bagemihl
Stonewall Inn Editions, 2000. ISBN 031225377X

Explodes the myth that homosexuality is not commonly found in nature. Research has documented homosexuality in more than 450 species of mammals, birds, reptiles, fish, insects and other animals worldwide, including instances of life-long homosexual bonding in species that show no evidence of heterosexual bonding for life. Bagemihl shows that the idea that animals engage in sexual activity simply for the sake of reproduction is an absurd distortion of nature. Lavishly illustrated and meticulously researched, filled with fascinating facts and astonishing descriptions of animal behavior, Biological Exuberance is a landmark book that will change forever how we look at nature.

Is It A Choice? Answers To 300 Of The Most Frequently Asked Questions About Gays And Lesbians

By Eric Marcus
HarperSanFransisco, 1999. ISBN 006251623X

In question and answer format, this book addresses commonly asked questions about what it means to be gay or lesbian. Answers leave room for further discussion of issues and differing perspectives. An excellent resource for people just coming-out who have a lot of questions.

A Family and Friend's Guide to Sexual Orientation: Bridging the Divide Between Gay and Straight

By Bob Powers & Alan Ellis
Routledge, 1996. ISBN 0415912768

This book is a collection of stories by (mostly straight) people who have had friends or relatives come-out. It explores how they have dealt with the adjustment and eventually come-out of their closets too. If you are a straight friend or family member this is a great resource.

My Child Is Gay: How Parents React When They Hear the News

By Bryce McDougall
Allan & Unwin, 1998. ISBN 1864486589

Fifty parents share how they coped and in some cases did not cope, with news that their son or daughter is gay. Parents discuss how they felt when they first found out, what they found helpful, who they could talk to, and how they feel today. My Child Is Gay is invaluable for the parent who may have only recently found out, or for the parent who simply doesn't understand. The book also gives the gay person insight into possible reactions from their parents.

Now That You Know - A Parents' Guide to Understanding their Gay and Lesbian Children

By Betty Fairchild & Nancy Hayward
Harvest/HBJ Book, 1998. ISBN 0156006057

Two American mothers of gay children, and gay and lesbian individuals recount their experiences. It contains solid information every parent should know about homosexuality. There is a very good chapter about AIDS as well. Now That You Know is one of the most understanding books you will come across that expresses everyone's feelings.

So Your Child is Gay - A Guide for Canadian Families and their Friends

By Dr. Gerald Bain & Phyllis Bruce
HarperCollins, 2000. ISBN 0006384927

A Canadian doctor and counselor wrote this supportive and informative guide for parents of homosexual children and for the children themselves who need parental understanding and acceptance. It explores myths, stereotypes, and prejudices and assists family members in dealing with their own inability to understand. It faces the questions that many parents have: Is it something we did? Can we not change our child? How can we tell our friends? What about AIDS? What does our religion say? Dr. Bain, a professor at the University of Toronto and an authority on human sexuality, draws on the stories of real people and lets them speak in their own words to readers. This is a sympathetic, readable, and informative guide that reaches out to all family members and offers insight and ideas for people who want to understand and love one another.

Straight Parents, Gay Children - Keeping Families Together

By Robert A. Bernstein
Thunder's Mouth Press, 1995. ISBN 1560250860

A straight parent, Robert Bernstein, tells how he came to terms with his daughter's homosexuality and how the experience has enriched his life. He discusses the myths surrounding homosexuality, accepting the news, parents who speak out, public figures who have gay children, and more. This is a survival guide for all parents who wish to help their gay children cope with the inevitable cruelty from which they cannot hide.

Feminizing Hormonal Therapy for the Transgendered

By Sheila Kirk
Together Lifeworks, 1999. ISBN 1887796045

Feminizing Hormonal Therapy For The Transgendered, the most highly-read and recommended book on the feminization of the transgendered, has been expanded and updated to include the most effective feminizing hormonal regimens and recent research findings. Vital, accurate and insightful information on safe and effective hormonal regimens, realistic expectations and possible complications are candidly addressed by gynecologic surgeon, Sheila Kirk, MD. Natural hormones, measurement and self-exam guidelines and answers to the most commonly asked questions are also featured.

Gender Shock: Exploding the Myths of Male and Female

By Phyllis Burke
Anchor Books, 1996. ISBN 0385477171

In Gender Shock, Phyllis Burke explores the many myths surrounding our rigid gender system of male and female. Analyzing the latest research in psychology, genetics, neurology, and sociology, Burke finds that gender is not the result of one's biological sex, and that gender and sexuality are separate elements of the self. Looking through three lenses of gender identity - behavior, appearance, and science - Burke challenges the notion that men and women are from different planets. By revealing how there are more variations within each sex than there are between the two, Burke urges the embrace of a 'gender independent culture,' one in which individuals develop their best traits traditionally associated with both sexes, e.g., strong and nurturing, rational and empathetic. An artful combination of investigative journalism, personal stories, and cultural criticism, Gender Shock liberates men and women alike from the prison of gender by envisioning a new and healthier understanding of our lives. - IFGE Bookstore

Invisible Lives: The Erasure of Transsexual and Transgendered People

By Viviane K. Namaste
University Of Chicago Press, 2000. ISBN 0226568105

Invisible Lives is the first scholarly study of transgendered people - cross-dressers, drag queens and transsexuals - and their everyday lives. Through combined theoretical and empirical study, Viviane K. Namaste argues that transgendered people are not so much 'produced by medicine or psychiatry' as they are 'erased, or made invisible', in a variety of institutional and cultural settings. Namaste begins her work by analyzing two theoretical perspectives on transgendered people - queer theory and the social sciences - displaying how neither of these has adequately addressed the issues most relevant to sex change: everything from employment to health care to identity papers. Namaste then examines some of the rhetorical and semiotic inscriptions of transgendered figures in culture, including studies of early punk and glam rock subcultures, to illustrate how the effacement of transgendered people is organized in different cultural sites. Invisible Lives concludes with new research on some of the day-to-day concerns of transgendered people, offering case studies in violence, health care, gender identity clinics, and the law. - University of Chicago Press

Read My Lips: Sexual Subversion and the End of Gender

By Riki Anne Wilchins
Firebrand Books, 1997. ISBN 1563410907

Over the course of the past decade transgender politics have become the cutting edge of sexual liberation. While the sexual and political freedom of homosexuals has yet to be fully secured, questions of who is sleeping with whom pale in the face of the battle by transgender activists to dismantle the idea of what it means to be a man or a woman. Riki Anne Wilchins's Read My Lips is a passionate, witty, and extraordinarily intelligent look at how society not only creates men and women - ignoring the fluidity of maleness and femaleness in most people - but also explains how those categories generate crisis for most individuals. It is impossible to read Wilchins's ideas and not be provoked in fundamental and mysterious ways. - Amazon.ca

Transgender Warriors: Making History from Joan of Arc to RuPaul

By Leslie Feinberg
Beacon Press, 1996. ISBN 0807079405

Transgender rights activist Feinberg presents evidence that there have been people throughout history who defy cultural boundaries of sex and gender, and urges us to recognize them as warriors and visionaries. The coverage actually extends back to the mythology of several cultures. Highly illustrated in black and white. - Book News, Inc., Portland, OR

FTM: Female to Male Transsexuals in Society

By Holly Devor
Indiana University Press, 1997. ISBN 0253336317

FTM: Female-to-Male Transsexuals in Society provides a compassionate, intimate, and incisive look at the life experiences of forty-five female-to-male transsexuals. Until now, little has been known about these individuals, and questions persist about them.? Who are they? How do they come to know themselves as transsexual? What do they do about it? How do their families cope? Who loves them? What does it mean for the rest of us?

Medical, Legal and Workplace Issues for the Transsexual

By Shelia Kirk, M.D. and Martine Rothblatt, J.D.
Together Lifeworks, 1995. ISBN 1887796002

Medical, Legal and Workplace Issues for the (MTF & FTM) Transsexual supplies comprehensive and accurate information addressing the medical, legal and workplace issues encountered through every phase of the sometimes challenging transition process. From the 'real-life test', to surgical, medical and legal concerns, to the start of life 'thereafter', this book provides the necessary tools and information to make transitioning proceed smoothly and successfully. A 'must-read' for male to female and female to male transsexuals beginning or currently engaged in the transition process.

My Gender Workbook: How to Become a Real Man, a Real Woman, the Real You, or Something Else Entirely

By Kate Bornstein
Routledge, 1998. ISBN 0415916739

Bornstein has assembled a collage of simple exercises, quizzes, puzzles, and essay questions that systematically break down our ingrained ideas about how women and men and whoever is in between should act. Bornstein's breezy, 'hey, let's all discover who we might really be' style works to make this potentially threatening material accessible and even intriguing to almost all readers. - Amazon.com

She's Not There: a Life in Two Genders

By Jennifer Finney Boylan
Broadway, 2004. ISBN 0767914295

The provocative bestseller She's Not There is the winning, utterly surprising story of a person changing genders. By turns hilarious and deeply moving, Jennifer Finney Boylan explores the territory that lies between men and women, examines changing friendships, and rejoices in the redeeming power of family. Told in Boylan's fresh voice, She's Not There is about a person bearing and finally revealing a complex secret. Through her clear eyes, She's Not There provides a new window on the confounding process of accepting our true selves. - Anna Quindlen, from the Introduction to the Book-of-the-Month-Club edition.

Transgender Care : Recommended Guidelines, Practical Information, and Personal Accounts

By Gianna E. Israel, Donald E. Tarver & Diane Shaffer
Temple University Press, 1998. ISBN 1566398525

By empowering clients to be well-informed medical consumers and by delivering care providers from the straitjacket of inadequate diagnostic standards and stereotypes, this book sets out to transform the nature of transgender care. In an accessible style, the authors discuss the key mental health issues, with much attention to the vexed relationship between professionals and clients. They propose a new professional role; that of 'Gender Specialist.'

True Selves: Understanding Transexualism For Families, Friends, Co-workers and Helping Professionals

By Mildred L. Brown & Chloe Ann Rounsley
Jossy Bass, 2003. ISBN 0787967025

Filled with wisdom and understanding, True Selves paints a vivid portrait of the conflicts transsexuals face on a daily basis, the courage they must summon as they struggle to reveal their true being to themselves and others. This classic resource offers valuable guidance for friends, families, coworkers, and professionals who are struggling to understand these people and their situations. Using real life stories, actual letters, and other compelling examples, True Selves gives a clear understanding of what it means to be transsexual and offers practical suggestions for dealing compassionately with these commonly misunderstood individuals.

Trans Forming Families: Real Stories About Transgendered Loved Ones

By Mary Boenke
Oak Knoll Press, 2003. ISBN 0615123074

One of the best books ever written about transgender families. Written by families who have a transsexual brother, son, daughter, sister, aunt, uncle, niece, nephew (etc.), this book is still one of the most recommended for families of a trans person.

Body Alchemy: Transsexual Portraits

By Loren Cameron
Cleis Press, 1996. ISBN 1573440620

Body Alchemy: Transsexual Portraits is a unique and extraordinary photographic collection by artist Loren Cameron. Body Alchemy is Loren Cameron's intensely personal photo documentary of female-to-male transsexuals (FTMs). A transsexual himself, Cameron brings a sensitive, sophisticated insider's eye to his subject matter. Using documentary style, a series of before-and-after photographs documenting the transformation of a number of FTMs in Cameron's transsexual community, his own striking self-portraits, and intimate autobiographical text, Loren invites the viewer to experience this transformational rite of passage. Loren Cameron's work strikes a warm, familiar tone that invites the viewer's participation - even when the subject matter is quite startling.

My Husband is Gay: A Woman's Survival Guide

By Carol Grever
Ten Speed Publishing, 1990. ISBN 1580910890

Carol Grever and her husband, Jim, were high school sweethearts who married in their early twenties. Thirty years and two children later, Jim announced to his wife that he was homosexual. A fundamentalist Christian, he had been leading a double life for years. In an effort to process her pain and confusion, Carol Grever sought out other heterosexual women, of all ages, ethnicities, and educational backgrounds, who were married to gay men. The stories she uncovered examine these women's coping strategies and form the basis of this manual for healing.

The Other Side of the Closet: The Coming-Out Crisis for Straight Spouses and Families

By Amity Pierce Buxton
Wiley, 1994. ISBN 0471021520

An invaluable book incorporating the author's seven years of research and interviews with hundreds of spouses with insights derived from her own teaching and counseling work. Contains stories and tactics for straight spouses and their families to constructively cope with a mate or family member who declares his/her homosexuality. Analyzes six key issues a straight spouse faces when a partner `comes out' including damaged sexuality, threatened marital relationships, conflicting spouse/parent roles, devalued self-concept, destroyed integrity and shattered belief systems. - Wiley Publishing

Changing Ones: Third and Fourth Genders in Native North America

By Will Roscoe
Palgrave MacMillan, 2000. ISBN 0312224796

Will Roscoe makes a valuable contribution to our understanding of both Native American culture and alternative gender construction in this extension of the groundbreaking research in The Zuni Man-Woman. More than 150 tribes across America have members who engage in some form of gender identification beyond 'male' and 'female.' Roscoe's study reveals how integral these third and fourth genders, and same-sex marriage, have been to the tribes' societies, in contrast to the intolerance demonstrated by the Judeo-Christian culture of the descendants of European invaders. His analysis of these tribes, rooted in the empirical evidence of their histories, also provides a fascinating counterpoint to theories about homosexual identity rooted solely in modern, Western preconceptions. - TransgenderCare.com

Two Spirit People: American Indian Lesbian Women and Gay Men

By Lester B. Brown, Ph.D.
Harrington Park, 1997. ISBN 1560230894

Two Spirit People is the first-ever look at social science research exploration into the lives of American Indian lesbian women and gay men. Editor Lester B. Brown posits six gender styles in traditional American Indian culture: men and women, not-men and not-women (persons of one biological sex assuming the identity of the opposite sex in some form), and gays and lesbians. He brings together chapters that emphasize American Indian spirituality, present new perspectives, and provide readers with a beginning understanding of the place of lesbian, gay, and bisexual Indians within American Indian culture and within American society. This beginning will help you understand these unique people and the special challenges and multiple prejudices they face.

Two-Spirit People: Native American Gender Identity, Sexuality, and Spirituality

By Sue-Ellen Jacobs, Wesley Thomas & Sabine Lang
University of Illinois Press, 1997. ISBN 0252066456

'Makes spectacular contributions to current understandings of 'third gender' constructions in American Indian societies and in other settings. This volume converts a lifeless, stereotyped image into a vast array of living, breathing, thinking, and talking people who are in no sense dependent for voice on non-Indian scientists.' - William L. Leap, coeditor of Out in the Field: Reflections of Lesbian and Gay Anthropologists

Intersex and Identity: The Contested Self

By Sharon E. Preves
Rutgers University Press, 2003. ISBN 0813532299

Approximately one in every two thousand infants born in the United States each year is sexually ambiguous in such a way that doctors cannot immediately determine the child's sex. Some children's chromosomal sexuality contradicts their sexual characteristics. Others have the physical traits of both sexes, or of neither.

Drawing upon life history interviews with adults who were treated for intersexuality as children, Sharon E. Preves explores how such individuals experience and cope with being labeled sexual deviants in a society that demands sexual conformity. By demonstrating how intersexed people manage and create their own identities, often in conflict with their medical diagnosis, Preves argues that medical intervention into intersexuality often creates, rather than mitigates, the stigma these people suffer.

Intersex in the Age of Ethics

By Alice Domurat Dreger
University Publishing Group, 1999. ISBN 1555721001

Intersex in the Age of Ethics marks the first time an entire volume has been dedicated to the exploration of the ethics of intersex treatment. It could not be more timely; professional conferences, gender clinics, and the popular media are abuzz with the controversy over how medicine and society should handle intersex and intersexuals. The volume will provide some much-needed perspective. The writings approach the issue of intersexuality and its treatment from numerous perspectives, including the personal, ethical, clinical, legal, anthropological, historical, sociological, and philosophical. - Alice Domurat Dreger, Author

Transgenderism and Intersexuality in Childhood and Adolescence: Making Choices

By Peggy T. Cohen-Kettenis & Friedemann Pfäfflin
SAGE Publications, 2003. ISBN 076191711X

There is little doubt that children with gender problems suffer psychologically. But when clinicians are confronted with such cases, they often make controversial choices without the benefit of a substantial knowledge base. Transgenderism and Intersexuality in Childhood and Adolescence: Making Choices presents an overview of the research, clinical insights, and ethical dilemmas relevant to clinicians who treat intersex youth and their families. Exploring gender development from a cross-cultural perspective, esteemed scholar Peggy T. Cohen-Kettenis and experienced practitioner Friedemann Pfäfflin focus on assessment, diagnosis, and treatment issues. To bridge research and practical application, they include numerous case studies, definitions of relevant terminology, and salient chapter summaries.

Homosexuality and Family Relations

By Frederick W. Bozett & Marvin B. Sussman
Haworth Press, 1990. ISBN 0866569472

Edited by two experts on family relations, this book covers a wide range of issues from a GLBT perspective: religion, adoption and parenting, married gays and lesbians, and aging.

The Gay Man's Guide to Growing Older

By John Lockhart
Hushion House, 2002. ISBN 1555835910

Based on media representations alone, you might think that the average age of American gay men is approximately 28. But the fact is, the gay population is aging at the same rate as the general population, with one in five over the age of 60. And while the heterosexual population is awash with representations of seniors, the gay population has virtually nothing in the way of older role models. John Lockhart provides a series of memorable snapshots of aging gay American men in these interviews crossing all regional, financial, and ethnic boundaries. The men reflect on a broad spectrum of issues: sex, spirituality, self-image, finances, health, and retirement living. A straightforward and practical book, The Gay Man's Guide to Growing Older gives gay men a touchstone for planning their years as vital, productive, passionate seniors.

Dress Codes: Of Three Girlhoods - My Mother's, My Father's and Mine

By Noelle Howey
Picador, 2002. ISBN 0312269218

Throughout her childhood in suburban Ohio, Noelle struggled to gain love and affection from her distant father. In compensating for her father's brusqueness, Noelle idolized her nurturing tomboy mother and her conservative grandma who tried to turn her into 'a little lady.' At age 14, Noelle's mom told her the family secret straight out: 'Dad likes to wear women's clothes.'

As Noelle copes with a turbulent adolescence, further confused by the male and female role models she had as a girl, her father begins to metamorphose into the loving parent she had always longed for - only now outfitted in pedal pushers and pink lipstick. Could becoming a woman make her father a completely different person? With edgy humor, courage, and remarkable sensitivity, Noelle Howey challenges all of our beliefs in what constitutes gender and a 'normal' family.

Gay Dads: A Celebration of Fatherhood

By David Strah, Susanna Margolis & Kris Timken (Photographer)
Tarcher Paper, 2004. ISBN 1585423335

This is the first book of its kind to provide such an expansive and inspiring exploration of this unique journey of fatherhood. Also included in Gay Dads is a comprehensive resource directory for readers interested in starting their own families.
fathers. It is possible, it is practical, and it is a fundamental right as human beings. Gay Dads is truly a celebration of fatherhood, a stunning and moving portrayal of this new family unit in America that will prove an invaluable companion and is sure to be the definitive guide of its kind. - GayDads.info

Lesbians Raising Sons

By Jess Wells
Hushion House, 1997. ISBN 1555834108

Lesbians are having babies left and right, and, as Jess Wells points out in her introduction, lesbians who conceive via donor insemination have a 65 percent chance of bearing a son. Times have changed from the radical lesbian separatist days of the '70s and '80s when male children were unwelcome at some lesbian events and communities. Still, raising a man-child in this culture is not an easy thing for lesbians to do. Wells, who has a son, has gathered a wide range of personal essays by lesbian moms including Jenifer Levin, Robin Morgan, Lillian Faderman, and Merril Mushroom that describe the rewards and problems of being a lesbian mom. - Amazon.ca

1-2-3, A Family Counting Book (Preschool)

By Bobbie Combs & Danamarie Hosler (Illustrator)
Two Lives Publishing, 2001. ISBN 0967446805

Have fun with the kids, moms, dads and pets in this delightful book that celebrates alternative families as it teaches kids to count from one to twenty. All of the full color paintings depict families headed by gays and lesbians. Two dads read a bedtime story to their kids; two moms share Popsicles with their kids on the porch; and several families gather around the campfire on a summer night. - Amazon.com

ABC A Family Alphabet Book (Preschool)

By Bobbie Combs, Desiree Keane (Illustrator) & Brian Rappa (Illustrator)
Two Lives Publishing, 2001. ISBN 0967446813

'So far, most of the books published for kids in gay and lesbian families have been very issue-oriented. I wanted to see some books where the fact of the family being different wasn't the focal point of the book. So I thought of making an alphabet book, where kids could say the letters and just see families like theirs having fun in the pictures. I'm glad that the book is being used in daycares and being read to all children. That way kids can see families that might be different from their own'. - Bobbie Combs, Author

All Families Are Different (Ages 4 - 8)

By Sol Gordon & Vivien Cohen (Illustrator)
Holiday House Inc., 2004. ISBN 0823408876

A sensitive exploration of different families, all bound together 'with a special kind of glue called love.'

Heather Has Two Mommies (Ages 5 and up)

By Leslea Newman & Diane Souza (Illustrator)
Alyson Publications, 2000. ISBN 1555835430

'Heather's favorite number is two. She has two hands, two feet, two knees and two elbows. She has two pets: a black dog named Midnight and a ginger-colored cat named Gingersnap. Heather has two mommies: Mama Jane and Mama Kate. When Heather goes to day care, she learns that families come in all shapes and sizes: Joshua has a mom, a dad and a step-dad; Miriam has a mom and a baby sister; David is adopted. Heather also learns that 'the most important thing about a family is that all the people in it love each other.' Who are the people in your family?' - Leslea Newman, Author

King & King & Family (Ages 6 and up)

By Linda De Haan & Stern Nijland
Ten Speed-Tricycle Press, 2004. ISBN 1582461139

Join newlyweds King Lee and King Bertie on their journey into the noisy jungle. The kings are greeted by wild animal families, but the royal travelers suspect that something more significant awaits them in the trees. King and King soon discover that there's no adventure more wonderful than starting a family of their own. - Tricycle Press

Lucy Goes To The Country (Preschool)

By Joe Kennedy & John Canemaker (Illustrator)
Alyson Publications, 1998. ISBN 1555834280

Madcap adventures ensue when a gay couple and their cat spend the weekend in the country.

Molly's Family (Preschool - Age 6)

By Nancy Garden & Sharon Wooding (Illustrator)
Douglas & McIntyre, 2004. ISBN 0374350027

The members of Ms. Marston's kindergarten class are cleaning and decorating their room for the upcoming Open School Night. Molly and Tommy work on drawing pictures to put on the walls. Molly draws her family: Mommy, Mama Lu, and her puppy, Sam. But when Tommy looks at her picture, he tells her it's not of a family. 'You can't have a mommy and a mama,' he says. Molly doesn't know what to think; no one else in her class has two mothers. She isn't sure she wants her picture to be on the wall for Open School Night.

Molly's dilemma, sensitively explored in words and art, shows readers that even if a family is different from others, it can still be happy, loving, and real. - Amazon.ca

One Dad, Two Dads, Brown Dad, Blue Dads (Ages 2 - 6)

By Johnny Valentine & Melody Sarecky
Alyson Publications, 1999. ISBN 1555832539

Two children-one with blue dads, one from a more traditional family-compare notes in this light hearted, easy-to-read book about parents who are different. In the end, of course, they discover that blue dads aren't really that different from other dads. Except for one thing. Full-color illustrations throughout. - Alyson Publications

The Daddy Machine (Ages 4 - 8)

By Johnny Valentine & Lynette Schmidt (Illustrator)
Alyson Publications, 2004. ISBN 1555838464

In a fantasy reminiscent of Dr. Seuss, two kids with lesbian mothers fantasize about what it would be like to have a father. When their mothers go away for the day, the kids make themselves a daddy machine, and soon they get their wish: They turn on the machine, and a dad pops out. Then comes another, and another, and another. 'Sue,' the narrator says, 'we did a good job, but we're kind of in a fix. The machine is great, but we missed one thing. It doesn't have an OFF switch!' - Alyson Publications

The Sissy Duckling (Ages 4 - 8)

By Harvey Fierstein & Henry Cole (Illustrator)
Simon and Schuster, 2002. ISBN 0689835663

Elmer is not like the other boy ducklings. While they like to build forts, he loves to bake cakes. While they like to play baseball, he wants to put on the halftime show. Elmer is a great big sissy. But when his father is wounded by a hunter's shot, Elmer proves that the biggest sissy can also be the greatest hero.

Acclaimed actor and playwright Harvey Fierstein has crafted a heartwarming story, based on his award-winning HBO animated special, about learning to embrace the special qualities we all possess. Henry Cole's gently humorous illustrations give it a new vitality. This is a book to share with all children, to help them understand that each one of them is unique and valuable. - Simon and Schuster

We're Different, We're the Same - Sesame Street (Preschool - Grade 1)

By Bobbi Kates & Joe Mathieu (Illustrator)
Random House Books For Young Readers, 1992. ISBN 0679832270

Illustrated in full color. The colorful characters from Sesame Street teach young children about racial harmony. Muppets, monsters, and humans compare noses, hair, and skin and realize how different we all are. But as they look further, they also discover how much we are alike.

Who's in a Family? (Ages 4 - 7)

By Robert Skutch & Laura Nienhaus (Illustrator)
Ten Speed Press, 1990. ISBN 188367266X

Family is important, but who's in a family? Why, the people who love you the most! This equal opportunity, open-minded picture book has no preconceptions about what makes a family a family. There's even equal time given to some of children's favorite animal families. With warm and inviting jewel-tone illustrations, this is a great book for that long talk with a little person on your lap. - Ten Speed Press

Families Like Mine: Children of Gay Parents Tell It Like It Is

By Abigail Garner
HarperCollins Canada, 2004. ISBN 0060527579

Abigail Garner was five years old when her mother and father divorced and her dad came out as gay. Growing up immersed in gay culture, she now calls herself a 'culturally queer' heterosexual woman. As a child, she often found herself in the middle of the political and moral debates surrounding lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) parenting. At the age of twenty-two, she began to speak publicly about her family and has since become a nationally recognized advocate for the estimated 10 million children growing up with LGBT parents. The creator of FamiliesLikeMine.com, Garner has written a deeply personal and much-needed book about gay parenting, from the seldom-heard perspective of grown children raised in these families.

How It Feels to Have a Gay or Lesbian Parent: A Book by Kids for Kids of All Ages

By Judith E. Snow
Harrington Park Press, 2004. ISBN 1560234199

In their own words, children of different ages talk about how and when they learned of their gay or lesbian parent's sexual orientation and the effect it has had on them.

Out of the Ordinary, Essays on Growing up with Gay, Lesbian and Transgendered Parents

By Noelle Howey, Ellen Samuels, Margarethe Cammermeyer & Dan Savage
Stonewall Inn Editions, 2000. ISBN 0312244894

Out of the Ordinary is a truly unique anthology, a groundbreaking collection of essays by the grown children of lesbian, gay, and transgender parents. Ranging from humorous to poignant, the essays touch on some of the most important and complicated issues facing them: dealing with a parent's sexuality while developing an identity of one's own; overcoming homophobia at school and at family or social gatherings; and defining the modern family. In a time when traditional family structure has undergone radical change, Out of the Ordinary is an important look at the meaning of love, family, and relationships, and will speak to anyone who has lived or is interested in non-traditional families.

By Alex Sanchez
Simon & Schuster Children's Publishing, 2007. ISBN 1416908994

"Sometimes fiction is the perfect medium for going deeper in our exploration of faith and sexuality. This is certainly the case with Alex Sanchez's new coming-of-age story, The God Box. Although there are plenty of excellent novels out there that explore the complex emotions around coming to terms with sexual identity, few also explore the equally complex pull of religious belief. Sanchez's novel is a fun, engaging story that will deepen your spirituality and your faith in humanity. I only wish The God Box was around when I was a teenager!" - Harry Knox, Director, Religion and Faith Program, Human Rights Campaign

Gay, Lesbian, And Transgender Issues In Education: Programs, Policies, And Practice

By James T. Sears, Ph.D.
Harrington Park Press, 2005. ISBN 1560235233

Understand the challenges from the voices involved - today's LGBT youth AND the leading educators and scholars in the field!

Gay, Lesbian, and Transgender Issues in Education presents LGBT youth issues through the words of the adolescents themselves, along with clear up-to-date essays about LGBT youth programs, policies, and practices around the world. Leading international educators and scholars examine personal experiences of LGBT youth, cutting-edge programs, and research first presented in the International Journal of Gay & Lesbian Issues in Education. Dynamic and thought-provoking, this insightful book brings together ideas and a vision vital for the future of today's LGBT youth.

Invaluable for educators, counselors, graduate and undergraduate students, and LGBT youth alike, Gay, Lesbian, and Transgender Issues in Education is readily accessible and easy-to-read, yet still provides in-depth, multidimensional examinations of the LGBT youth programs and practices essential for the propagation of social tolerance, acceptance, and safety of our youth. The LGBT youth voices sing clear their views about the urgent need for programs and policies within educational resources to challenge the present dominant intolerant thinking. The editor presents cogent essays that reveal the complex issues of the educational programs and practices, while offering strategies and hope for societal change. The book strives for the ultimate goal of reaching LGBT acceptance within society, to move beyond simple toleration toward becoming completely equal regardless of sexual identity.

Gay, Lesbian, and Transgender Issues in Education explores:
- Transgender college students
- Bullying and homophobia
- Research on LGBT studies in education
- Teaching elementary preservice teachers
- Multicultural school-based programs for HIV education serving transgender youth
- Successes and deficiencies of gay-straight alliances
- Race and youth programs in urban high schools
- Growing up lesbian in Australia, New Zealand, and the United States
- Growing up gay in Japan and China

Gay, Lesbian, and Transgender Issues in Education is an essential exploration of LGBT issues and an excellent educational tool for educators, undergraduate and graduate students, counselors, social workers, LGBT youth, and for any professional working with LGBT youth.

I Could Not Speak My Heart: Education and Social Justice for Gay and Lesbian Youth

By James McNinch & Mary Cronin
Canadian Plains Research Center, 2004. ISBN 0889771782

This anthology documents the pain and misunderstanding that LGBTTQ people have experienced in the very recent past. It then demonstrates the real progress, both in theory and in practice, that has been made and will continue to be made in the 21st century. The struggle for equity and social justice for gay and lesbian youth is far from over, however, and much work remains to be done. A million people may have watched or joined the Gay Pride Parade in Toronto this year, but the debate about the status of queer citizens continues. Homophobia in its many forms continues to be an all-too-frequent factor in the lives of LGBTTQ citizens. Young readers in particular will find much diversity in this collection of nineteen articles: autobiography, testament, fiction, and found poetry, as well as more traditional personal and analytic essays. The reader will also see differences in intellectual perspectives across the chapters: human rights, social reform and human justice, feminist theory, liberationist theory, and queer theory. It is the intention of the editors that this book be used by educators in many fields so that students preparing for professions in education, in social work, in human justice, and in health and environmental studies will better understand the need to combat homophobia and embrace and celebrate sexual differences.

Lesbian and Gay Youth: Care and Counseling

By Caitlin Ryan & Donna Futterman
Columbia University Press, 1998. ISBN 0231111916

Medical, Legal and Workplace Issues for the Transsexual

By Shelia Kirk, M.D.
Together Lifeworks, 1995. ISBN 1887796002

Transsexual Workers: An Employer's Guide

By Janice Walworth
Center for Gender Sanity, 1998. ISBN 0966548809

Designed for employers, managers, human resources personnel, implementers of employee assistance programs, and others in a position to make workplace decisions about how to handle a transsexual employee's transition from one sex to the other. - Centre for Gender Sanity

Working with a Transsexual: A Guide for Coworkers

By Janice Walworth
Center for Gender Sanity, 1999. ISBN 0966548817

A short, easy-to-read source of information for people who have a transsexual in their workplace. - Centre for Gender Sanity

By Douglas Victor Janoff
University of Toronto Press, 2005. ISBN 0802087817

Despite Canada's reputation as a beacon for equality in the international struggle for gay rights, homophobia and homophobic violence remain major problems in the country. Since 1990, hundreds of gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered people have been assaulted or murdered in Canada, but so far there has been little mention of the phenomenon in Canadian criminology textbooks or other publications.

Pink Blood is the first book to analyze homophobic violence on a national scale. Douglas Victor Janoff uses social theory, legal analysis, descriptive case studies, and interviews with victims, activists, and police officers from thirty cities to convey the shattering impact this violence has had on queer Canadians and on the communities they inhabit. Janoff critically examines the concept of homophobia, the 'homosexual panic defence,' the ignorance and brutality of some Canadian police officers, and hate crime legislation and policies that, despite good intentions, are often powerless to counteract this complex and troubling social problem.

Drawing from a wide range of scholarship - law, criminology, sociology, psychology, philosophy and social work - Pink Blood is an important addition to the literature on queer life in Canada from a respected researcher and community activist. - University of Toronto Press

From Wounded Hearts: Faith Stories of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgendered People and Those Who Love Them

By Roberta Slowalter Kreider
Strategic Press, 2003. ISBN 0966482220

Written from the heart, forty-nine gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered people of faith share their stories.

More Than Welcome: Learning to Embrace Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, and Transgendered Persons in the Church

By Rev. Maureen, C. Waun
Chalice Press, 1999. ISBN 0827223250

As an outspoken advocate, Waun articulates the tremendous opportunity for the church to fill the spiritual needs of those who have been marginalized or even condemned. Her story is a compelling witness both to those in the lesbian, gay and trans community and all who stand with them. - The Other Side

Openly Gay, Openly Christian: A Gay-Friendly Approach to Scripture

By Rev. Samuel Kader
Leyland Publications, 1999. ISBN 0943595789

These issues and more are explored by Rev. Samuel Kader, a pastor in the flow of the gay Christian movement since 1975. Scriptural and anecdotal evidence is given to show that 'gay and Christian' is not an oxymoron. Rev. Kader's pastoral and personal insights make this a pioneering book for all gay people of Christian belief. - International Gay and Lesbian Review, USC

Stranger at the Gate: To Be Gay and Christian in America

By Mel White
Plume Books, 1995. ISBN 0452273811

If you have conflicting religious views, this autobiography is invaluable. It discusses coming-out of the closet to give hope to other gay and lesbian Christians, confronting the misleading anti-gay rhetoric of the radical right, and White's own fight for justice and understanding for God's gay and lesbian children.

The Church And The Homosexual

By John J. McNeil
Beacon Press, 1993. ISBN 0807079316

'In this 'brave and good book which shatters bad myths' (Commonweal), McNeill shows that the Bible does not condemn homosexuality, and argues that the Church must not continue its homophobic practices.

The Church and the Homosexual is a major weapon for those who are fighting to change the Church.' - The Reverend Paul Moore, Jr.

The New Testament and Homosexuality

By Robin Scroggs
Augsburg Fortress Publishers, 1983. ISBN 0800618548

'I sat amazed as I heard the Bible being invoked in ways that were wholly inappropriate to any canons of biblical scholarship. Perhaps something snapped in me...for better or worse I decided somebody needed to provide resources that would give both clarity and honesty.' - Robin Scroggs, Author

The Straight Person's Guide to Gay People's Anguish

By Jack Castiglione
Northwest Publishing Inc., 1992. ISBN 188041628X

Written by a member of Dignity, this book describes the journey of a Catholic gay man and his family.

What The Bible Really Says About Homosexuality

By Daniel Helminiak, Ph.D.
Alamo Square Distributors, 2000. ISBN 188636009X

The Bible does not condemn gay sex as we understand it today, those who seek to know outright if gay or lesbian sex is good or evil will have to look elsewhere for an answer. An extremely valuable contribution to popular gay and biblical studies. - Ray Olson

Journeys & Arrivals: On Being Gay and Jewish

By Lev Raphael
Faber & Faber, 1996. ISBN 0571198821

Reviewers have called Lev Raphael's fiction, which includes the Lambda Award-winning Dancing on Tisha B'Av and Winter Eyes, 'dazzling,' 'astonishing,' and 'masterful,' praising his 'passion for telling the truth, however painful' and his 'powerful message for Jews and non-Jews alike.' Journeys & Arrivals reveals in a collection of equally potent autobiographical and critical essays the influence these often conflicting identities of being gay and Jewish have had in his life and his writing. - LevRaphael.com

Wrestling with God and Men: Homosexuality in the Jewish Tradition

By Steven Greenberg
University of Wisconsin Press, 2004. ISBN 0299190900

Wrestling with God and Men is the product of Rabbi Greenberg's ten-year struggle to reconcile his two warring identities. In this compelling and groundbreaking work, Greenberg challenges long held assumptions of scriptural interpretation and religious identity as he marks a path that is both responsible to human realities and deeply committed to God and Torah. Employing traditional rabbinic resources, Greenberg presents readers with surprising biblical interpretations of the creation story, the love of David and Jonathan, the destruction of Sodom, and the condemning verses of Leviticus. But Greenberg goes beyond the question of whether homosexuality is biblically acceptable to ask how such relationships can be sacred. In so doing, he draws on a wide array of nonscriptural texts to introduce readers to occasions of same-sex love in Talmudic narratives, medieval Jewish poetry and prose, and traditional Jewish case law literature. Ultimately, Greenberg argues that Orthodox communities must open up debate, dialogue, and discussion - precisely the foundation upon which Jewish law rests - to truly deal with the issue of homosexual love.

This book will appeal not only to members of the Orthodox faith but to all religious people struggling to resolve their belief in the scriptures with a desire to make their communities more open and accepting to gay and lesbian members.

A Grief Recovery Guide for Gay Men

By David Wayne Silva
Buy Books on the web.com, 2000. ISBN 074140348X

This book provides readers with valuable information on how men grieve; and how they prepare for, and pass through, the death event. Personal stories of grieving men are combined with an action program containing step-by-step suggestions for identifying and combating depression, anger, and guilt. Readers are encouraged to define their present condition, build their own personal recovery program, and create a new identity. The book also contains information for terminally ill men and their partners, where they learn techniques for bonding as well as recording their shared experiences of love. This book is a resource guide for support personnel, a guide through bereavement. - Buy Books on the web.com

Disenfranchised Grief: Recognizing Hidden Sorrow

By Kenneth Doka
Lexington Books, 1989. ISBN 066917081X

Not LGBTT2IQQ specific, but a key work for understanding the concept of disenfranchised grief.

Gay Widowers: Life After the Death of a Partner

By Michael Shernoff (Editor) with Foreword by Felice Picano
Haworth Press, 1997. ISBN 156023105X

A recent gay widower may find that once the shock and initial confusion of losing his partner is overcome, there are still many hard, lonely, and overwhelming stages of grief to be worked through. Often, the bereaved feels isolated, and looking around for comfort, realizes that he doesn't have many resources to turn to, but Gay Widowers: Life After the Death of a Partner is a start. By offering first-person accounts of becoming a widower, this book, the first of its kind, allows others who are about to lose or already have lost a partner to find support, validation, recognition, and fellowship. Its editor and contributors hope that by sharing their stories of loss, pain, and bewilderment, they will help others in mourning as well as make one more step forward in their own healing.

Men of different ages and ethnic, religious, geographic, and economic backgrounds join together in Gay Widowers to remind other gay widowers that they are not alone and that their feelings of pain, anger, and emptiness are normal and legitimate. Not solely a book about life after the loss of a partner to AIDS, this book is about rebuilding life as a bereaved gay man, regardless of the cause of your partner's death. - Haworth Press

Lesbian Widows: Invisible Grief

By Vicky Whipple
Harrington Park Press, 2006. ISBN 1560233311

The death of a life partner poses unique challenges for lesbians. Lesbian Widows: Invisible Grief reveals the touching and very personal stories of twenty-five women, including the author, who were widowed at a young age and forced to create a new life without their life partners. The book follows the widows from the time the couple met, to the time when one of the partners died, and beyond, to show how the surviving partner coped with her loss.

Many lesbians feel that the intimacy felt between two women in love goes deeper than what can be experienced by heterosexual partners. Lesbian Widows: Invisible Grief reveals themes common to all these women's experiences while offering practical advice about coping techniques and resources for support. The widows discuss their efforts to create funerals and memorial services, give their accounts of the overwhelming grief throughout the first two years, and explain the legal and financial discrimination they encountered. The author provides a chapter specifically for caring family and friends, another chapter for professionals working with this sensitive population, and a bibliography of helpful coping resources. - Haworth Press

The Loss of a Life Partner

By Carolyn Ambler Walter
Columbia University Press, 2003. ISBN 0231119690

Although there is extensive research on the loss of a spouse, predominantly focusing on the experiences of widows, much less attention is paid to bereaved partners not married to their significant other, whether or not the partners are of the same sex. This first-of-its-kind work explores both socially sanctioned and disenfranchised grief, highlighting similarities and differences. Combining a discussion of various theories of grief with personal narratives of grieving men and women drawn from numerous interviews, and detailed case study analysis, Carolyn Ambler Walter has produced a penetrating examination of the bereavement experiences of partners in varying types of relationships. She views narratives of widows, widowers, and bereaved domestic gay and lesbian partners from a postmodern perspective that breaks away from the traditional belief that the living must detach themselves from the dead in order to move on with their lives. Instead, building on the works of postmodern grief theorists such as Klass, Silverman, and Nickman, Walter views ongoing bonds with the dead as a resource for enriching functionality in the present, and as a key to looking to the future. - Columbia University Press